Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
