You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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