oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
