i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
