Got a toothbrush?
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
