explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
