it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
