nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
