I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Randomize
