Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize