just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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