Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
