My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Randomize
