I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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