that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
