I didn't shave. On purpose
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Randomize
