My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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