How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
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