I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Randomize