I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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