your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Success! We fucked roommates!
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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