I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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