Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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