3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
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