new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Randomize
