I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
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