I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
