i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize
