What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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