she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
