I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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