I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Randomize
