just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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