You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize