wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
We need to feng shui this bitch.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
