Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
