Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
