but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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