I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
He better not be in your backpack
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
