oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Bring me that man meat
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I love you. Go after that dick
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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