That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
