Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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