...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
