yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Dicks are not precious.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
