why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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