This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize
