cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
