Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
