Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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