Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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