It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
