a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
