grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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